The curse of knowledge

As leaders, we often forget what it was like to begin. The uncertainty, the fear of making mistakes, and the challenge of navigating unfamiliar ground. This is the “curse of knowledge”: once we have mastered something, it feels so obvious that we assume others must see it the same way. We underestimate how valuable our experience, insights, and guidance actually are. The danger is that we stop teaching, mentoring, or coaching because we believe what we know is “too obvious” to be worth sharing.

We have to remember that what feels simple to us may be transformative for someone else. I think great leadership means remembering the beginner’s perspective and having the humility to meet people where they are.

Sharing my thoughts

I want to spend my time doing work that matters for people who care, and I ask these questions on a daily basis:
- Who am I here to serve?
- What change do I seek to make?
In the knowledge that the right clients come when I do meaningful work for the right ones. Contact me via email if you would like to book a complimentary 30 minute session.

““Everything I lose creates space for everything I need.” ”
— Unknown

Develop your skills

Investing in coaching is one of the best investments you can make if you are a leader, manager, or aspire to become one. How much time do you spend coaching your direct reports?

Here are 10 essential coaching skills to develop:
1. Empathy – Put yourself in their shoes.
2. Self-management – The ability to regulate your own emotions and behaviour.
3. Building trust – The foundation of all relationships.
4. Observational skills – Accurately reading situations and people.
5. Planning – Increasing the likelihood of reaching goals.
6. Active listening – A core skill for effective coaching.
7. Communication skills – Explaining clearly and holding others accountable.
8. Encouragement and praise – Reinforcing effort and growth.
9. Honest, useful feedback – Delivered constructively to drive improvement.
10. Analytical and problem-solving skills – Supporting others to find solutions.

Awareness is everything

Thoughts can influence feelings, which in turn can affect actions and outcomes. To obtain effective answers, it is beneficial to ask clear and thoughtful questions. For example:
·  What am I thinking?
·  Why am I choosing to think this?
·  What does this thought evoke?
·  What thought is causing this feeling right now?

I think when you ask a great question, you come up with great thoughts to think.

Context before content

White privilege is not saying your life has not been hard, it’s saying your skin colour hasn’t contributed to the difficulty of your life. I understand that your life as a white person may be hard because life is hard, but your whiteness isn’t what has made your life any more difficult. Whereas a Black person, your blackness has contributed to your difficulty. I think privilege is immunity from certain punishment or special access granted to certain things.

What are you doing with your privilege?
I say to my white friends and family members don’t feel guilty because you are white, I say use your privilege for the benefit for those that don’t have it.

The Unbearable Lightness of Being

Historically DEI has been an add on to HR and people management roles, however, post COVID that has changed and we are seeing more defined roles with clear roles and responsibilities. The path to working in the DEI space can vary significantly, I know plenty of people who entered the space through recruiting, HR, L&D, psychologist, etc. I came in through with my creative identity and commercial experience and simply wanted to make a transition into the DEI space. I think it’s important to identify your existing transferable skills and then work on strengthening the others you don’t have. What do you think?

It's your responsibility

Traditional engagement surveys often ask passive questions, and when people respond negatively, they tend to blame the environment. This teaches employees to complain rather than reflect. A more powerful approach is to ask active questions for example:
Did I do my best to be engaged today?
Did I do my best to find meaning?
Did I do my best to build positive relationships?”
Instead of waiting for the company to “engage them,” individuals are encouraged to take ownership of their own engagement. I think true growth happens when people move from blaming circumstances to taking personal responsibility for how they show up each day. What do you think?

Grounded presence

Who are the key stakeholders, and what behaviours do they want to see change?

That’s the question I help very successful leaders answer. My work focuses on achieving positive, long-term behavioural change, the kind that others notice and value. Even though my background is in marketing, branding, and communication, I don’t position myself as “the expert with all the answers.” Instead, I guide leaders to seek feedback, build effective follow-up processes, and take ownership of their development.

I am not in the saviour business so I choose to work with good people who genuinely care. And I don’t do this for status or fame, I do it because I believe leadership has the power to make the world a better place.

Who are you?

Radical self-acceptance is the ability to recognise who you are, acknowledge the unique value you bring, and trust in that value. It means accepting yourself at your current stage of the journey, while remaining confident that you have what you need to continue growing and developing. Are you interested in hearing more? Contact me via email if you would like to book a complimentary 30 minute session.

Ask better questions

We often think of professional coaching as a modern tool for leadership and performance, but its roots run deep. Centuries ago, Socrates was already demonstrating the power of dialogue by creating awareness, challenging assumptions, and awakening responsibility. For example:
- Instead of giving answers, he asked questions.
- Instead of teaching, he invited reflection.
- Instead of imposing truth, he guided others to discover it for themselves.

I think philosophy and ethics are inseparable from coaching. Some may dismiss them as abstract or tedious, but I see them as bold and transformative. Why? Because they challenge mindsets and behaviors at their very core which is also the essence of what I do as a coach.

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Looking through different lens

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How would the world be worse off if we did not exist?
In leadership coaching, this is a powerful question. Purpose is the competence of what you deliver as a leader. Culture is the intent behind how you lead others. And cause is the wider good you aspire to create through your influence.

Sustainable leadership shows that it’s possible to do well by doing good. Cultural diversity, for example, isn’t just about representation, it’s about fostering inclusiveness and valuing both differences and similarities within teams. Research shows that people, especially younger generations, are more engaged and committed when they believe in a cause-driven purpose. I think this only works when leaders demonstrate authenticity and coherence. Claiming to be “purpose-driven” isn’t enough; it must be visible in the way you lead, the culture you build, and the impact you create.

Humans are interlinked

Ubuntu means I am because we are, and because we are, you are.
It speaks to the interconnectedness of humanity and reminds us that our growth is tied to the wellbeing of those around us. In coaching, this principle is powerful, for example, thriving in a new role, culture, or environment often comes from finding your tribe and building supportive relationships. I think that when you surround yourself with people who understand and challenge you, you gain confidence, a stronger sense of belonging, and the resilience to succeed wherever you are.

Contact me via email to book a free confidential 30 minute call where we can discuss what support you are looking for, and how I could help.

You can, I can't

I was asked yesterday for a list of clients, and I explained that my coaching clients are confidential, so I cannot reveal the names of the organisations. Confidentiality is the essence of my business ethics - all my clients sign NDA’s, and I promise not to use their names or organisations for any promotional purposes. On the other hand, they are free to refer me to their colleagues, family or friends.

Impact vs effort

One of the keys to long-term success is building with complementary skill sets. If you’re a start-up founder, you need partners who excel at the things you can’t, not another version of yourself. Having joint CEOs almost always leads to competition, power struggles, and conflict. I think the most sustainable partnerships are built on differences that strengthen each other. In my experience, 90% of successful relationships come down to selection. When you develop accurate self-knowledge and learn how to truly discern the strengths of others, you can create fulfilling, high-performing relationships with a wide range of people.

Are you interested in hearing more? Contact me via email if you would like to book a complimentary 30 minute session.

Wise words from Steven Pinker

I came to the topic of common knowledge, that is, everyone knowing that everyone knows that everyone knows something, through my interest in language. In language, most of what we say isn't exactly what we mean. People say things like, if you could pass the salt, that would be awesome. And that's not literally what they mean. They mean, give me the salt. And many of our conversations use euphemism, innuendo, and beating around the bush. How come? Why don't we just blurt what's on our mind? I realized that the answer is that language has to do two things at once. On the one hand, you're conveying a message. The other hand, you are negotiating what kind of social relationship you have. Are you friends? Are you lovers? Are you transaction partners? And that is done through common knowledge. That is, two people are friends if each one knows that the other one knows that the first one knows that the second one knows that they're friends. And so when we use euphemism, I realize what we're doing is we're trying to prevent common knowledge. And that's what led me to the realization that common knowledge is the key to all of our social relationships.

Measuring the wrong thing

Why is most of what we measure in business is meaningless?
Today, people are more distracted than ever by false proxies, things that are easy to measure but ultimately meaningless. In hiring, it might be: Do you look like me? Did you attend the same university? This criteria has no proven link to someone’s ability to perform well. Online, it’s the vanity metrics that social media platforms make so easy to track. What really matters is impact: did I create enough change in someone that they want to share it with others? I think when they do, it raises their status and strengthens their connections and that’s the real signal of value.

Nobody cares about your agenda

There’s a big difference between telling the others and finding the others. Telling the others comes across as, “I need your support, please tell everyone about me”,  but the truth is, no one really cares. Finding the others, on the other hand, means connecting with people who already share your interests, values, or goals. When they support and spread the word, it reflects positively on them and it makes them look smart, connected, and ahead of the curve. And I think that’s something people actually care about. What do you think?